Day 17: Choose Your Relationships Well
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Some people drain me. Some people fill me up. And some people are mutually beneficial.
I don’t walk around telling people which category they’re in — but I do think about it for the sake of my mental well-being.
If I have too many draining people in my life, I become burdened, tired, and stressed.
If I only spend time with those who fill me up, I might be hogging them from others who need them too.It’s not about being judgmental or elitist.
It’s about caring for yourself so you can actually care for others.Even Jesus didn’t give equal time to everyone.
He spent some time with the crowds, more time with His disciples, even more with Peter, James and John — and even more again with John alone.We all have limited relational capacity.
So make sure you choose your relationships wisely.
Let’s Talk
Let’s be honest — not everyone in your life is good for your soul.
Some people inspire you, challenge you and draw you closer to God.
Others leave you feeling angry, on edge, anxious, annoyed or guilty for simply having boundaries.
But here’s the truth: You’re not called to be everyone’s emotional sponge.
Jesus was love personified, but even He set boundaries.
He withdrew from the crowd.
He walked away from arguments.
He said “no” without apology.
He invested most deeply in the few who would carry the mission forward.
That’s not selfish — it’s strategic love.
Your soul needs space to breathe.
And your calling needs clarity about who’s walking with you and who’s just watching from the sidelines.
This isn’t about cutting people off recklessly. It’s about being wise with your energy, your time, and your peace because loving people well doesn’t mean giving everyone unlimited access to you.
Scripture
“Jesus often withdrew to lonely places and prayed.”
— Luke 5:16 (NIV)
“Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.”
— Proverbs 4:23 (NIV)
Mental Health Moment
Boundaries aren’t just about saying no — they’re about saying yes to the kind of life your soul can actually sustain.
Without them, we risk burnout, resentment, emotional exhaustion — or worse, losing ourselves trying to manage everyone else’s emotions.
John Mark Comer calls it the eremos — the “lonely place,” the wilderness where Jesus often withdrew to pray. It wasn’t a place of isolation or avoidance, but a place of renewal. A sacred space where clarity returns and peace is restored.
In a world that constantly demands more — more availability, more access, more yeses — boundaries become a form of worship. A way of saying: I am not God. I can’t hold everything together. And I don’t have to.
The healthiest people aren’t the most available — they’re the most aligned. The ones who’ve learned to say, “This relationship matters… but so does my sanity.”
It’s okay to love deeply without giving unlimited access. Even Jesus didn’t allow that.
Practice for Today
Think of 3 relationships in your life: one that fills you up, one that drains you, and one that’s mutual.
Ask God for wisdom: What needs adjusting? What conversations need to be had? Where is your energy being misused?
Then ask yourself: What would boundaries like Jesus look like in my life this week?
A Prayer for the Overextended
Jesus,
You loved people fiercely —
but You also knew when to walk away, when to rest, and when to invest deeper.
Teach me to love like that.
Help me not to feel guilty for protecting my peace.
Give me courage to speak honestly, rest intentionally, and build relationships that reflect Your wisdom.
Amen.
Reflection Prompt
Which relationship in your life needs a boundary right now — not to punish them, but to protect your peace?
What would that boundary look like if Jesus helped you draw it?
