Postpartum Psychosis, Schizoaffective Disorder & Faith in Chaos: Lydia’s Story
In This Episode:
Summary / Introduction:
In this episode of the Sunburnt Souls Christian Mental Health Podcast, host Pastor Dave Quak sits down with Lydia Farbach, a counsellor and new mum navigating life after postpartum psychosis. Lydia shares her raw and redemptive story—growing up with a mother diagnosed with schizoaffective disorder, facing her own breakdown after giving birth, and finding healing through faith. Together, they explore Christian mental health, breaking the stigma around postpartum illness, and the beauty of a God who meets us in the chaos of anxiety, depression, and guilt.
Growing Up with Mental Illness in the Family
Lydia’s understanding of mental health began young. Her grandfather battled PTSD after serving in Vietnam, and when Lydia was just twelve, her mother was hospitalised during a psychotic break.
“I remember visiting her in the ward,” Lydia says. “There were people screaming, swearing, and no one helped. As kids, we just had to cope.”
Her mum was diagnosed with schizoaffective disorder—a mix of schizophrenia and bipolar—and spent years adjusting to medication. Lydia recalls the isolation and fear of not knowing when the next episode might happen. Those experiences shaped her heart for compassion and later inspired her to become a counsellor.
Yet they also planted a deep fear: “I always worried that I’d end up like her. That one day, I’d lose control too.”
The Descent: Postpartum Psychosis and the Breaking Point
Seven months ago, Lydia gave birth to her son, Arthur, after a 40-hour labour. What began as joy quickly spiralled into exhaustion and confusion.
“I was sleeping maybe an hour a night and drinking litres of water trying to breastfeed,” she recalls. “Then I started believing strange things—like my husband didn’t love our son, or that our bodies were merging.”
What followed was a terrifying night. Lydia became convinced she was dying, screaming for an ambulance as her body and mind went into psychotic collapse. She was rushed to Logan Hospital, where she prayed Psalm 23 through tears: “God, save my life. Don’t let me never see my son again.”
Even in her altered state, Lydia felt God’s nearness. “In the ambulance, with Hillsong playing, I cried out to Jesus. I had nothing else left but Him.”
Finding Faith-Based Healing and Hope
Lydia was admitted to Katherine’s House, a rare mother-baby mental health unit in Brisbane that allows mums to stay with their infants while receiving psychiatric care. “That place saved my life,” she says. “It was the only reason I didn’t have to be separated from Arthur.”
She began treatment with antipsychotic medication, losing the ability to breastfeed but slowly regaining stability. Along the way, her faith became both a refuge and a wrestle.
“There were days I couldn’t feel God at all. The meds made me numb. But looking back, I can see He was carrying me—one hour, one breath, one prayer at a time.”
Lydia’s husband became her anchor through the storm. “He wondered if I’d ever be stable again,” she admits. “But our marriage grew stronger. God held us both.”
Breaking the Stigma: The Church and Mental Health
As a pastor, Dave asks the question many churches wrestle with: how can the body of Christ better support new mothers facing postpartum depression, anxiety, or psychosis?
Lydia’s answer is clear. “The church needs to talk about it. Mental illness isn’t a lack of faith—it’s a health issue that needs both spiritual and medical care.”
She urges Christian communities to:
Provide practical help like meals and babysitting so mothers can rest.
Educate families about sleep deprivation, a key trigger for psychosis.
Offer faith-based resources that integrate prayer with professional support.
Her message to others is compassionate and real: “You’re not a bad mum because you’re struggling. You’re human. God meets you in the breakdown.”
From Breakdown to Breakthrough: Lydia’s Message for Mothers
Recovery hasn’t been linear. Lydia still faces derealisation—feeling like life isn’t quite real—and ongoing medication effects. But her faith has deepened.
“Even when I couldn’t feel God, I knew He was hovering over me. He kept whispering, ‘Lydia, I’m here for you.’”
Her journey reminds us that healing is not the absence of struggle—it’s the presence of God within it.
As she prayed on the podcast: “Lord, awaken the Church to see how vulnerable new mums are. Bring community, support, and real connection. Amen.”
Final Encouragement
Lydia’s story is a powerful reminder that faith and mental health can coexist. Whether you’re battling anxiety, depression, or psychosis, your struggle doesn’t disqualify you from God’s love—it draws Him closer.
When life feels overwhelming, remember Psalm 23: “Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for You are with me.” Healing doesn’t always come quickly, but in Christ, hope is never far back—it’s always right here.
Call to Action
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